Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Alkemia Perfumes Haul & Review

Someone on Gothy Discord recommended Alkemia Perfumes, and I checked them out immediately. They really remind me of Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, which I've longed for for years, but it's just too expensive (particularly the shipping, $30+ for the cheapest option). Alkemia's shipping was less than half of that, so I decided to try them out! I selected five perfumes that intrigued me, and built my own sample set.

I got two extra samples, so I will review those too! The back of one of the cards says ''Your perfume has traveled some distance to be with you and like many travelers, it might need up to 48 hours to rest in a room temperature enviroment to return to its best.'' The package had been lying in our mailbox for about a day and a half, (and it's still pretty cold here), but I of course smelled them all immediately, and they were heavenly! When it was closer to 48 hours since they were brought inside, I smelled them again, and I couldn't believe how much better they smelled! Some of them changed a lot.

Let me just state that I have an incredibly strong sense of smell / sensitive nose, and I'm not knowledgeable on perfume and what scents I like. Nobody's experience with the same smells will be the same, and of course your natural body scent will change how it smells. So my experiences and opinions of these perfumes could be drastically different to yours.
Below are the photos that go with each perfume as well as their descriptions, and of course my thoughts on each one! Click each perfume name to go to its product page.

An homage to unsettling, eccentric, irresistible beauty - bergamot, mandarin, dark violet, Italian iris, black orchid, Japanese incense, orris root, sueded musk, white sandalwood, Tahitian vanilla, and pale patchouli.

"There is no excellent beauty that hath not some strangeness in its proportion." - Francis Bacon

Madame X was John Singer Sargent’s most infamous painting. When it debuted at the Paris Salon of 1884, the public was horrified and called it a scandalously immoral image. The model was Virginie Gautreau, a New Orleans ex-pat who was notorious throughout Paris for her elegant demeanor and unusual looks which she accentuated by dusting her skin with a special pale purple powder. Her nose too long by accepted standards and her forehead considered too high, yet the total effect of her eccentric beauty was irresistibly seductive. Gentlemen were captivated. Society mavens sneered. Artists begged to be allowed to paint her portrait or sculpt her in marble. An American art student named Edward Simmons wrote of being “thrilled by every movement of her body."

My thoughts: My first impression is that this smells like a high-class lady. I don't think I can pick up an individual scent, it all blends nicely together. To me the smell stayed the same for hours, but it got fainter. When it had almost gone completely away, I thought I could smell the vanilla, maybe one of the other base notes. In conclusion: A very feminine perfume, kinda exotic. I imagine this going well with that fancy feel I get when wearing more victorian outfits.

Come to Me Oil is a hoodoo conjure recipe of botanical and mineral elements designed to attract the attention and romantic interests of someone you want to bring closer to you. Some people use Come to Me oil to invite the universe to attract a new (unknown) lover or to help reinvigorate a relationship that's gone a little stale. There are many variations of Come to Me oil. Ours is designed for people who identify as female to attract either male or female lovers.

Some Come to Me recipes are very utilitarian but we like ours disguised as a sweet and sultry perfume with an erotic edge so our recipe includes candied rose petals, star jasmine, peach blossom, cardamon infused figs, pink pepper, orris root, Mexican vanilla, tonka bean, cashmeran, white amber, sugar musk, and white patchouli infused with botanical pheromones, lodestone, Jezebel root, and other specialty ingredients.

"Come live with me and be my love, And we will all the pleasures prove, That Valleys, groves, hills, and fields, Woods, or steepy mountain yields. And we will sit upon the Rocks, Seeing the Shepherds feed their flocks, By shallow Rivers to whose falls Melodious birds sing Madrigals." - Christopher Marlowe

My thoughts: Mmm, this smells like candy! Very fresh, kinda sharp, potent, but not too strong. I couldn't stop smelling my wrists, so it works on me, haha! I think this could definitely attract someone, it's heavenly and sweet. I noticed that it changed on me pretty quickly, I like it on me more than smelling the bottle. I felt like it gave off waves of itself, so I'd be careful with reapplying, cause it lingers. Also Simen agrees with me on it! Success.

A bewitchingly spellbinding olfactory enchantment. Whispers of smoked frankincense and benzoin float across a tapestry of finely tanned Moroccan leather, Mayan vanilla, and black tonka. Like the ancient practice of wishing on the first star of evening, tonka is said to help one fulfill one's desires if you whisper your intention aloud as you apply it.

My thoughts: Exotic and enchanting, like a (magic) market in the Middle East or something. It really smells like old leather when exposed to air. I'm not a big fan of the leather smell. The vanilla and tonka showed up after maybe 30-40 minutes. After a couple of hours I thought I could smell the frankincense. It's not very strong, but when you smell it, it's a very.. ''full'' smell, I want to say. ''Warm'' too. I think this one could be suitable for men since it's not so sweet. Simen tried it, and it smelled better on him after a couple of hours, and even later the vanilla really came out!

A historical recipe from the 1700's court of Versailles created by a mistress to delight a king. A paradox of the decadent and the divine - erotically dark cacao and uplifting French lavender blended with piquant black cardamon pods, a splash of tea with lemon peel, and an elegant flirtation of grapefruit blossom and vanilla musk.

“Madame de Pompadour excelled at an art which the majority of human beings thoroughly despise because it is unprofitable and ephemeral: the art of living.” ― Nancy Mitford, Madame de Pompadour Mistress of King Louis XV

Madame de Pompadour was a patron of the arts, science and literature. Her wit and intelligence were as seductive as her beauty and she is considered one of the three most powerful women of the 18th century, along with Catherine the Great of Russia (Catherine II) and Maria Theresa of Austria. Mme de Pompadour was known for creating the unique and the beautiful... the pompadour hairstyle is named for her, as are marquise diamonds, and it was whispered that the shape of the bowls of champagne glasses were created from the shape of her breasts.

My thoughts: In the bottle it smells quite sharp and is very strong, and I smell the cocoa ''high up''. On me it really smells like an old-timey perfume! It's really similar to something I think I smelled as a kid. Slightly sweet and fresh, I don't notice the cocoa on me. My mother-in-law smelled it on me and agreed on the "old-timey" smell, and said I'm "too young" to wear it, haha. I agree though! 

“But there are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life, fully, entirely, completely - or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands. ” ― Oscar Wilde, Lady Windermere's Fan

A naughty philtre of carnations, dianthus, absinthe, green patchouli, and bay rum. On 20 February 1892, Oscar Wilde asked one of the actors to wear a green carnation boutonniere for the first performance of his play Lady Windermere’s Fan. Wilde's friends were also invited to wear green carnations. Although he professed the green carnation meant "nothing whatever," it invoked many subversive themes - Irish nationalism, an homage to "La Fée Verte" also known as absinthe, and possibly the unnaturally colored carnation was Wilde’s way of making fun of a conservative society that viewed homosexuality as 'unnatural.'

My thoughts: Ok, while I picked this out myself, I'm still surprised about this! I couldn't pick up anything specific in the bottle, but once I applied it to myself I instantly smelled it. My first impression was ''green'' - in a good way, cause usually that wouldn't be something I like. Slightly flowery, but also fresh, I smell the absinthe and patchouli. I wanna say that I can smell leather, so I think this could be suitable for men. It's not strong at all, I think.
On Simen, once I put it on him it smelled like a plant store. It seems to be much stronger on him, and I think I like it better on him. So I'm probably right in this working for men! But no matter who you are, if you think this one is interesting, give it a try.

A curious wandering into forested mystery - dark heirloom roses, arctic roseroot, Alaskan cypress, juniper berries, Sitka spruce, balsam pine needles, bracken ferns, green cedar tips, and luminous green amber.

“I am a forest, and a night of dark trees: but he who is not afraid of my darkness, will find banks full of roses under my cypresses.”― Friedrich Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra

Art: Pompeii roses in a fresco from the domus of the Golden Bracelet in Pompeii, mid–1st century C.E.

My thoughts: Warm, sweet.. forest. Usually I'm not a fan of most ''green'' smells (including flowers), but this one isn't bad. My skin invokes more of the forest smell, but after maybe 10 minutes I smell the rose. It makes it smell.. old? Like a fairytale? Or just fabric softener, haha. It's a fresh smell, it's just that it smells like it's an ancient recipe or something like that.
Simen tried it cause he likes forest smells, and IMMEDIATELY when he got it on, the forest smell just hit me in the face. WAY too much for me, but he owns a foresty perfume that is much stronger than this, so he doesn't think it's strong. After 10 minutes or so on him the forest faded and the rose showed up too. He describes it as ''a field at the edge of a forest''. I'd say this is pretty unisex.

A beguilingly spicy, delightfully sexy blend of Madagascar and Tahitian vanillas and Tonka nestled in with a warm melange of ancient Ottoman trade spices (cardamon, ginger, and Grains of Paradise) reknowned for 'heating up' affairs of the heart and inspiring desire.

My thoughts: Very vanilla! When you open it, you get some of the spices. It reminds me of IKEA scented candles, haha. On me the vanilla is strong, Simen smells more spices on him. It's not very strong, but it lasts for hours.

I love the sample box, great presentation there, and the bottles look good too. The bottles are secure (might be hard to open), but you do risk some spillage when you open them because they're corked and full. I think they're a pretty good size. While they seem tiny, these perfumes can be pretty strong, so these bottles are more than enough to figure out if you like them or not.

It's quite difficult to shop for perfumes without smelling them, that's why I went for samples. If you are familiar with what scents you like, but can't decide which perfumes you want (or don't want to go through everything they have) you can also order a custom made sample set! They have themed sample sets too.
In addition to samples they have the classic 5 ml amber bottle, 4 ml rollerball and 1 oz spray. If the perfume you're looking at says ''extrait'', that's regular perfume strength, if it has an option for ''ultime'', those are extra strong for those who need that. They even have alcohol free options too!
For US customers they are now selling sanitizing sprays, unscented or choose one of the two scents. There are different packages as well.

Their website is really neatly organized, so it's easy to find something you like. Gorgeous artwork that goes with every perfume, and descriptions that really lure you in. I love that they add some history to them.
Price wise I think they're pretty decent. I think the samples are pretty affordable, the regular sizes are decently priced and the 1 oz / 30 ml is at a normal price or even cheaper than other perfumes. They also have a special limited offer on 3 rollerball or amber bottles (3 extraits for $45, 3 ultimes for $60) right now, I don't know how long that will last. So what are you waiting for? Go check them out now! I will definitely shop with them again.

Sunday, March 29, 2020

Post-2000s Goth Band Masterpost

Two years ago I published this masterpost of old school goth, post-punk and adjacent bands. Since then I've wanted to do the same for modern ones! So now I'm finally getting around to it. I'm not even gonna try to list every single band out there, since there is SO much good stuff coming out nowadays. I'm sure you'll find something new you like, and make you explore the modern goth scene even more!

Edit: Someone made a playlist out of all of the bands (minus 3) on this list, amazing! Check it out here.

Ash Code

Aeon Sable
Agent Side Grinder
Agnes Circle, The
All Your Sisters
Angels Of Liberty
A Projection
Ariel Maniki And The Black Halos
Ash Code
A Slice Of Life
Arts Of Erebus
Astari Nite
Bat Nouveau
Beauty Of Gemina, The
Bellwether Syndicate, The
Black Marble
Bleib Modern
Bloody Dead And Sexy

Christ vs. Warhol (hi, Elian!)

Boy Harsher
Box And The Twins
Buzz Kull
Cemetary Girlz, The
Christ vs. Warhol
Cinema Strange
Cold Cave
Cold Showers
Creux Lies
Cruz De Navajas
Crying Vessel
Date At Midnight
Death Bells
Diva Destruction
Dk Postoronnih
Double Echo
Drab Majesty
Dystopian Society
Eat Your Make-Up

Echoes Of Silence
Eden House, The
Fangs On Fur
Foreign Resort, The
Forever Grey
Geometric Vision
Golden Apes
Grave Pleasures
Grooving In Green
Horror Vacui
House Of Harm
Kentucky Vampires, The
Kill Shelter

Nox Novacula

KVB, The
Kælan Mikla
La Fete Triste
La Scaltra
Lebanon Hanover
Led Er Est
Light Asylum
Linea Aspera
Living Temples
Long Night
Los Carniceros Del Norte
Lust Era
Medicines, The
Merciful Nuns
Minuit Machine
Molchat Doma
Murder Mystery, The
Near Earth Orbit
New Breed
New Today

Sally Dige

Night Nail
Night Sins
Nox Novacula
O. Children
October Burns Black
Panic Priest
Paradox Obscur
Plastique Noir
Pleasure Symbols
Principe Valiente
Ritual Howls
Ritual Veil
Rope, The
Rosegarden Funeral Party
Sally Dige
Scarlet's Remains
Scary Black
Second Still
Secret Shame

Solemn Novena (hi, Andi!)

Senex IV
Shad Shadows
She Past Away
She Pleasures Herself
She Wants Revenge
Silent Runners
Sixth June
Skeleton Hands
Soft Kill
Soft Moon, The
Solemn Novena
Soror Dolorosa
Soviet Soviet
Strap On Halo
Suffering For Kisses
Supernova 1006
Sweet Ermengarde
Sydney Valette

Void Vision

Terminal Gods
Them Are Us Too
Then Comes Silence
This Cold Night
Tragic Black
Tropic Of Cancer
Turn Pale
Twin Tribes
Veil Of Light
Velvet Condom
Virgin In Veil
Void Vision
Whispering Sons
White Lies
Winter Severity Index

I think I'll stop there! There you have over 150 gothrock, deathrock, post-punk, darkwave, coldwave, synth, etc. bands formed after (or didn't release an album before) 2000. A lot of them are even after 2010! Hope you enjoyed and discovered something new. Feel free to comment names of bands I have missed!

Sunday, March 22, 2020

The Goodbye Family And The Great Mountain by Lorin Morgan-Richards Review

I received an email from the author who wanted to send me a copy of this book, and once I read what it was about, I immediately said yes! This is definitely up my alley, as I love spooky children's books.

This book is about a family of undertakers; the mother Pyridine is a mortician and a witch, the father Otis drives the hearse and their daughter Orphie is a grave digger.
Their neighbors are turning into zombies, and since there are no bodies to bury, they're out of business. They decide to travel to the underworld through the cemetery in their backyard, and discover an evil plot they have to stop.

It reminds me of  The Addams Family and A Series Of Unfortunate Events, with sprinkles of Roald Dahl and a wild west setting. There's plenty of illustrations, the text is semi-big with lots of space, and it's around 250 pages. There are funny quotes like “Dreary afternoon, my progeny”, ''Oh my goth'' and ''For goth's sake''. There are some words that could be difficult for younger children to understand, and of course dark humor and spooky themes. So it really depends on the child, but I think it would be best for older children, and of course anyone who loves stuff like this.

Sunday, March 15, 2020

Gothest haul ever

Lame title, I know. But I've gotten myself a bunch of things the past month or so, and thought I'd compile it all in one post and show it to you! I'll also include some party photos from this weekend at the end.

I'll show one book I've gotten. There are more, but this is the one I'm most excited about! It's a HUGE book about deathrock and it's origins. It's at least A4 sized and over 600 pages. I've made it our featured book in the book club I run on Gothy Discord, but I have no idea how long it'll take to read. I haven't read much in the past two weeks, but I've read a few chapters already. I will probably be posting a review when I finish it! You can buy it here.

I ordered two CDs from 13th Chime's Bandcamp page, and they kindly sent me Senex IV's debut album as well! The latter is a new band which features two members from 13th Chime. It's not exactly a goth band, but it's really interesting.

I bought all of these from a seller on Discogs. Lots of old goodies! While I prefer to support artists as much as I can, it can get hard when you HAVE TO order online to do so. Shipping, taxes and customs to Norway piles up to a lot, so it's rarely worth it to order unless you can get many from the same place. But at the same time I don't think there's anything wrong with thrifting music! It's fun to hunt, and a great way to grow your collection. When you do it online you can find specific albums you've been wanting for a long time but can't get where you live.

Note: With the situation around the world right now, I highly recommend supporting artists, especially smaller ones. They're losing a lot of money from having to cancel shows and tours, so buy their merch if possible, and digital music if you're into that!

KVD Beauty just launched here in Norway, so I stopped by a make-up store and got myself a brow pomade. Lately I've just used eyeshadow, and even though that has worked fine for me, why not try something that might be even better. I've tried it once so far, and MAN, it's so smooth and pigmented! There are photos where I have it on further down in this post.
Also bought the first black nail polish I've owned in.. almost 3 years. I bought a purple one recently too, but it was super cheap, so it flakes off instantly, haha. This black one is so pigmented you only need one layer! It's not the best when it comes to flaking, but when I have every other nail black and purple, the black is definitely looking good in comparison.

Just have to gush over these ADORABLE shoes! Got them second hand, I was SUPER excited to find a pair of shoes in size 35! I need at least that to wear dainty shoes like this. They fit me perfectly, and now I'm constantly wearing them around the house. Can't wait for summer so I can wear them out!

Also; I got cyberlox! A teenage dream has been fulfilled, and just at the right time! I don't own a respirator, I'm not really a fan of that look, but now I should have one, haha. I actually think the cybergoth look suits me! I've been a cybergoth on the inside for years, and now in the time of the toiletpapocalypse she's here!

Choose your team

Our local goth night got cancelled because of the virus (Norway is very affected), so my friend decided to host the pre-party for the whole night. Thursday I was smacked in the face with so many cancellations and just Norway shutting down in general, so we wanted to have SOME fun before the entire world goes to shit! I hope everyone is doing okay out there. I'll try to get some reading done and write up some blog posts.

Friday, March 6, 2020

Spiderweb contrast sleeve DIY

So this was something that randomly happened in the middle of the night. Someone on Gothy Discord asked how you do this, and after I explained how, I remembered that one of my blazers had a bare sleeve, and I also happened to have a pair of white stockings that had started to get too ripped to wear. Let me take you through this late-night DIY journey!

I first cut off the lace tops of the stockings, which I considered to sew onto the blazer as cuffs for a second, but decided against it. I kept them, there might be something else I'd like to do that to! If I was going to be a traditional bride, I could have used them as garters.
Anyway, I threaded the stocking over the sleeve to see if it was a good fit. The length was pretty much perfect, but it was a little tight. Either way I thought it would look nicer to cut it up more, plus get rid of the tiny red hearts going along the back of the stockings.

Here's the piece after cutting off the excess, and ripping it up a little. My favorite technique for stocking ripping is a fork, and then pulling. You then get smaller holes, but more runs, which is the look I prefer. Then I fastened one edge with a couple of safety pins around the shoulder seam of the blazer. I did a lot of playing with placement, pulling it around, and I cut into it a few places so there would be more ''air'' and I could stretch it even more. Basically treat it as you would when you decorate with cotton spiderwebs for halloween, and secure with safety pins!

So there's the finished work from all angles, and a look at how the rest of the blazer looks. Those who have followed this blog since almost the beginning might remember when I made this! It's been.. 3 years now? The cool thing about garments like this is that you can update them over the years. Switch out pins / buttons and even patches, and just add whatever decor you feel like. Let them evolve with you!

Saturday, February 22, 2020


I recently made my very first ASOS purchase! My friend Teresia shops there a lot, and she always looks amazing, so I finally decided to give it a try! I mainly wanted belts, since I've really been loving them lately. I found one belt that I saw Louise had, I complimented it, but I thought it was several, turns out it was once piece! So when I saw it, I had to have it. I love it so much already!


I'm really happy with my order! Everything was relatively cheap, and I spent enough to get free shipping. Got slapped in the face with taxes and customs when I picked it up though, which added up to be half the order value. Life in Norway! I ordered in the evening, and it was shipped the next morning - I think it's the norwegian postal service's fault that it took closer to two weeks to get here.

ASOS seems to have a good range of sizes, they have petite, tall and plus size sections, often the same products for different sizes, which is pretty cool. I was a little scared the belts would be too big for me, but Teresia found a size chart, and the waist of the smallest sizes would fit me (but not the hip). The belts I bought are meant to be waist belts. The first one fits both my waist and hips, the second and third only fit my hips and waist respectively. I might be able to get the second one around my waist, if I ONLY use the O-ring part and let the chain part hang down.

Can't wait to put all of these into use along with different outfits! I think belts like this are a really good way to jazz up even the simplest of outfits. I'm definitely a fan of low effort, especially cause I suck at remembering to accessorize. But I've gotten better! And there's nothing like getting pieces you're really excited about to motivate you.

Saturday, February 15, 2020

Accidental Valentine's Date

About a month ago we planned to go out to eat before this month's goth night, cause Simen had a weekend off for once, and got paid a couple of days before. A while later I saw a Valentine's meme on facebook and realized what day we had planned this on... I asked Simen if it was on purpose, and it wasn't! So we made sure to get a reservation, haha. I also pointed this out to the goth night DJs and asked them to play Friday I'm In Love, since it'd be perfect! I also pestered them with more suggestions up until the day of, haha.

So here's my look!
Decided to go with a dress, since I wear them so rarely.
This one is thrifted, it's so cool and fits pretty well!
I'm actually wearing it backwards.
Red eyeshadow and stockings cuz luuuv.

I managed to get a good photo of us!
This took many tries, haha.

We ate at Jamie Oliver's Italian, which is a relatively new restaurant here, I've wanted to go there since I saw it opened. We got there a little early, so we ordered drinks at the bar while we waited. I got a blackberry amaretto sour (really good!) and Simen got a rosemary negroni (the rosemary actually did a lot). The food was really good, and it wasn't super expensive. I'd definitely go there again! I of course had the carbonara, since that's my favorite dish, I could eat it every day. It was angel hair pasta, with A LOT of bacon - including a random thin slice of crispy bacon on top, haha. Simen liked his burger, and the fries were really good. Just after I took the photo below the server came with fresh parmesan for me, and gave Simen an aioli - which was DELICIOUS. I love aioli, but hate when they barely taste of garlic. This one tasted SO strongly of garlic, haha.

We were so full we couldn't do dessert, so we went to where goth night is held (the bar Simen works at, which he just became bar manager of) and hung out with his coworkers before goth night started. Simen got the DJs to play The Mission's Butterfly On A Wheel and we awkwardly slowdanced alone on the dancefloor. Hilarious and sweet. We probably won't even do that at our wedding, haha!

Here is the playlist for the night:

We sadly had to leave at 1, cause Simen is actually sick. He has a fever and everything! He's such a trooper for have lasted that long. He knew I had looked forward to it since we made the plans, but when I noticed he was almost falling asleep, I told him if he feels he needs to go home, we're going home. Funnily enough we left during Kælan Mikla's Sýnir, which meant we JUST missed this:

I'll listen to the rest of the playlist later. I started working on our wedding playlist this week, and I sent it to one of the DJs for inspiration, and I was sure they'd play other stuff I could put on it too. It's already super long already, probably more than we need, but that's just how it is, haha.

Today we planned to stay at home anyway. Simen wanted to drive to the store and get some stuff, but I refused to let him move and called my dad instead. So now I've gotten him a care package, and he can stay on the couch until he's better. It might be the flu, so he just has to ride it out.

Aside from typing this post out, I'm reading to Svartpunkt. magazine and listening to the CD that came with it. It's a new Swedish magazine about dark alternative music. I saw Simon (Coalcandy) post about it on facebook a week ago, and immediately wanted to support it. So I got a subscription! I'll be getting the 4 issues plus a bonus issue for subscribers and be entered for giveaways. The magazine is like your ''proper'' magazine, glossy and pretty thick. Like I mentioned it includes a compilation CD, from what I can tell by all Swedish artists. Not sure if they're including one for every issue. The magazine is written in Swedish by the way, so if you wanna get it, you should either understand Swedish, or.. not care, haha.

The magazine is only one of many things I've ordered for myself lately, so I might do a haul post soon! I've already posted some stuff on Instagram, so make sure you follow me there.

Sunday, January 12, 2020

Dracula (2020 BBC / Netflix series) Review

Ok so I'm sure most people have heard of this by now! I actually didn't know about it until I saw a review in the local paper, and just a couple of days later I got messages from several people. Oh you know me so well. So now, let me tell you what this Dracula / vampire nerd thought about it!

The series consists of three almost movie long episodes, similar to the new A Christmas Carol which came out recently (which I highly recommend, by the way! It's really dark and has interesting backstories). Dracula is played by Danish actor Claes Bang, and he's going for the more sexy (but mature) vampire. I'm really impressed by his English, I have to say.
The show has a very Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat style, they got the same composers too, which was pretty easy to hear. They kept some aspects from the book and some inspiration from other adaptions, but it's overall a very ''Sherlock goes horror'' vibe, kind of mindfuck at times, like the last Sherlock season. I know Gatiss loves horror, I remember I once stumbled over his documentary series A History Of Horror. Speaking of, they made a documentary for this as well, called In Search Of Dracula (fun fact; Jonathan Ross did one with the same name in the 90s). I couldn't find that, but if / when I do, I will watch it.

The next three paragraphs consist of my thoughts while watching each episode:

Why are there so many flies?! Disgusting. I was prepared though, I know stuff like this can feature insects, so I made sure to finish my food before I started. But good news; no spiders!
Ok looks like we're going for the ''Harker and Renfield are the same person'' angle.
The nun is super inappropriate, but through her we get flashbacks to Harker's trip to Transylvania - with some annoying interruptions when she asks questions.
Dracula is a parody of himself. Did not like our first moments of him, when he's old looking.
But the rest of the first episode was decent, there was a lot of action, and it wasn't predictable. I recognise the castle as the same one from Nosferatu (1922)!

Episode two is in the same style as the first in terms of narration, but this time, bizzarely, Dracula is playing chess with and telling van Helsing about his journey on the Demeter (the episode is fittingly titled Blood Vessel). And apparently their conversation and game turns out to be some kind of dream sequence? I'm not quite sure. Jonathan Aris plays the captain of the ship, and among the passengers are newlyweds Lord Ruthven and Dorabella. I like that in this adaption we actually get to see what happened on the Demeter, which we don't in the book or most other adaptions. The end of the episode left me a little confused. See next paragraph!

Okay I can't possibly leave this out; the third episode takes place in the present.
We meet Lucy Westenra, and I really love what they did to her character. A woman of color who gets tons of likes on Instagram and goes night clubbing - a modern party girl! The perfect way to modernize Lucy. What happens to her here is even more horrible than in the book, you actually feel bad for her, while book Lucy is more ''good riddance, you were annoying''.
Of course Jack Seward, Quincey Morris and Arthur Holmwood make appearances, but only Jack is of importance. We barely get to see the others, really.
Also, I was wrong about one of the first things I thought when I started this; Renfield actually shows up! Played by Mark Gatiss himself. It's fun to see Dracula and Renfield actually interact.
One thing I came to think of; since Dracula is first shown looking ancient, and gets younger after feeding on Jonathan, why is he still young when he wakes up in the present? He hasn't had blood for 123 years, but doesn't seem hungry.
OMFG Dracula using Tinder, now THAT is hilarious. Nice spin on ''children of the night - what music they make'' and ''bloofer lady''.
I feel the ending was very... Sherlocky. I don't know how to feel about it. Also I didn't mention this before since it's kind of a spoiler for the first episode, but I just have to say that making van Helsing a woman and ''reincarnating'' her was a nice choice, even though that has been done before.

So in conclusion; I actually feel very similar about this as with Sherlock. It's not THAT great, but fun to watch, it can fuck with your head and frustrate you. I'd say if you enjoyed that, give this a go. And don't give up immediately, I know some people did that, and I can understand why, the first episode had quite a rocky start, but it got better. They were obviously not going for making another ''WE are finally gonna be the ones to stay true to the book!'', not at all. And I think that's a good thing. Dracula (and Sherlock) are literally the two characters that have been adapted the most in literary history, and I think they did a pretty decent job at bringing new life to and modernizing them.
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