Friday, November 30, 2018

Norwegian Crash Course!

In my norwegian national costume, the bunad
Hey! I wanted to make a post where I teach you some norwegian - but more fun stuff, and not the standard stuff you probably learn if you take courses in it. Let's see what I can come up with! Let's start with some words. Here are some words that mean something else than you'd think, and some unique words.

Dress - Suit
Full - Drunk
Pupper - Boobs
Gift - Poison.. and married
Skadefryd - Joy over others getting hurt
Harry - Weird
(Brød)Skive - A slice of bread with toppings. We eat open-faced sandwiches!
Pålegg - The shit we put on it! Can be anything.
Grønnsaker - Green stuff (vegetables)
Vorspiel - Preparty
Nachspiel - Afterparty
Utepils - Enjoying a beer outside (usually starts when it becomes 10C outside)
Helvete - Hell (often used as a swearword, and also the name of Euronymous' black metal shop)
Faen - Fuck (but the word is derived from ''devil'', so ''fuck you'' is ''faen ta deg'' - ''may the devil take you'')
Fitte, mus, høne, dåse - Pussy (literal translations of the latter three: mouse, hen, box with lid)
Pikk, kuk, kølle, snabel, loff, løk - Dick (literal translations of the latter four: club / bat, trunk as in elephant, white bread, onion)

When I worked at Disney World, there were three innocent words we norwegians couldn't say in front of guests, since it could sound like english swearwords:
Faktisk - Actually (fuck this)
Kant - Edge (cunt)
Kokk - Chef (cock)

Thought I'd include this, a famous and funny example of how weird we norwegians are:
Literal translations:
Hæ? - What?
Oi! - Whoops!
Nei, men! (Usually shortened to ''næmmen!'' - No, but!
Ellers? - Or else?
Du? - You?

How about some weird phrases?
Slå / skru på / av - Hit / screw on / off
Trene - Work out
Øve - Practice
Oppmuntre - Encourage
Muntre opp - Cheer up
Smak og behag - Taste and pleasure (a matter of preference)
''Det finnes ikke dårlig vær, bare dårlige klær'' - There is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothes (norwegians really like the outdoors, ok)
''Å ha bein i nesa'' - To have bones in your nose (basically means that you're tough. I say I have metal in mine, haha!)
''Jeg har en høne å plukke med deg'' - I have a hen to pluck with you (I got a bone to pick with you)
''Å tråkke i salaten'' - To step in the salad (to make an embarrassing mistake)
''Å bæsje på leggen'' - To poop on the leg (Same as above. And when norwegians say ''legg'' we mean the part between the knee and ankle / foot)
''Ta deg en bolle'' - Take yourself a bun (Calm down, or that you're just plain wrong)
"Kjært barn har mange navn" - A dear child has many names (we have many names for the things we love, I guess)

As you probably know, Nemi is norwegian! So how about I translate a strip for you?
Official Nemi Facebook page
''I like old houses.''
''Think about all the history that sits in these walls! People have lived completely different lives here in the same place!''
''Someone might even have died in here! And who knows what hides behind the walls here! A door, a staircase...''
''Down to a secret torture chamber!'' ''I like new houses.''

I bet norse mythology is a big reason why some people would like to learn norwegian or other scandinavian languages. So let's look at some words from the old legends!
Åsgard - Ås farm (''ås'' is the single form of ''æsir''. Now ''ås'' means ''hill''. Åsgård is also my last name! The spelling ''gård'' is just the modern way)
Svartalfheim - Black-elf-home
Helheim - Hel's home (so where the word ''helvete'' / ''hell'' comes from)
Blodighove - Bloody head (At least in modern norwegian)
Jernsaksa - The iron scissors
Skade - Damage (In modern norwegian)
Vilje - Will
Bjørn - Bear
Ran - Robbery
Malstrøm - Maelstrom (did you know that Edgar Allan Poe was the first to use this word in english?)
Vinter - Winter
Natt - Night
Dag - Day
Sol - Sun
Måne - Moon

The days of the week are also connected to norse mythology!
Mandag - Moon day
Tirsdag - Ty(r)'s day (in new norwegian it's called ''tysdag'')
Onsdag - Odin's day
Torsdag - Tor's day
Fredag - Frøya's day
Lørdag - Washing day (laugardagen, laundry day)
Søndag - Sun day (well that wasn't obvious at all, was it)

And since the holidays are coming up, I'll share some norwegian traditions with you!
The 13th of december is Lucia day, which comes from a catholic celebration. Children dress in white, wear crowns and carry a candle, and sing the Lucia song. ''Lussekatter'' is also baked!

We still call it ''jul'' (yule, ''wheel''), so we're still pretty rooted to our pagan ancestors.
We call the 23rd ''lille juleaften'' (little yule eve), and a big tradition is to watch ''Dinner For One'', as you can see in the photo above. Local Bergen brewery made Miss Sophie and James beers last year! I just saw in the shop that they have added a Mr. Winterbottom one for this year.

We celebrate on the 24th, and we eat ''ribbe'' (pork ribs) and / or ''pinnekjøtt'' (literally ''stick meat'', salted and dried ribs of sheep). Other foods we eat is julepølse (sausages), medisterkaker (fatty meatballs), and, yes; lutefisk. Earlier in the day we often eat rice pudding, and it's tradition to put an almond into it, and the person who gets it wins a prize (usually a marzipan pig).
In the evening some people go around the tree and sing songs, and children might have ''santa'' visit. We call santa claus ''julenissen'', and we also have ''nisser'', which I guess are mischievous elves? They sell tons of creepy little dolls here. Anyway, then we open presents. This is very much a family day, you usually don't celebrate with friends.

The 25th is ''første juledag'' (first yule day), also a family day. More food is consumed.
The 26th is ''andre juledag'' (second yule day). This day you might spend time with more people than just the family, and going to the movies is popular.
The time between yule and new years is called ''romjul''. Some people go back to work during this time, as the big ''exchange days'' start. We have no shame and spend these days exchanging our presents, haha.

Okay, that was all I could think of! Hope you have learned some fun facts :D
If you have any other questions or requests, I'll gladly answer them, maybe even do another post!
Norwegians reading this: Do you have any fun norwegian facts to share in the comments?

Saturday, November 24, 2018

Obscura Undead Website Launch!

I'm happy to announce that I've teamed up with some friends to launch the new website Obscura Undead! It's a website that will feature new and obscure post-punk, darkwave, goth and other genres. There will be tons of music reviews, news about upcoming and new releases, interviews and lifestyle posts! In the goth scene the same old music tends to be played over and over again. While we love that music, we are passionate about finding and promoting new great bands in the scene.

So if you're interested in finding new dark music to listen to, please check us out!
The team consists of myself, DJ Azy, DJ Maus, Christopher Risano, DJ Veine, Chandler Crenladh, DJ Seraph and Jason Seibert. Four of them are based in Tampa, Florida, so they also organize events!

Check out our facebook page for news, and our facebook group for discussions!

There might be a chance I'll be posting less here, since I'll be posting on Obscura Undead at least once a week. There isn't that much happening in my life right now anyway. But if you want me to review music that isn't new (hell, even 70's is cool with me), let me know! I love talking about music, even the old stuff. I just don't know what to post about on here! Reviews of good books I'll post whenever I finish reading them, and of course regular life posts will come when I have something to talk about, haha. As for other ideas, I want to do a little norwegian crash course just for fun! If there's anything you want to learn, comment below! Next month there will also probably be a year in review post, I'm thinking maybe one for my life, and one for music maybe. If you have any requests for posts, just drop me a line anywhere! See you next time, or on Obscura Undead!

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Goth VS Gothic

Image source: Gothic Charm School

I got an email today from a reader who requested me to go more in-depth about the whole goth vs gothic thing. I'm happy to help people out! If anyone else have any requests for stuff I can write about, go right ahead and send me an email at

So the main question is: Is goth JUST about music?
Not really no, but it is the main part. Without the music this subculture wouldn't have existed. People didn't call themselves goths 100 years ago or more, even though the gothic was really popular. The gothic has given inspiration to the goth subculture, so we can't completely dismiss it. But what I and a lot of others usually say to newcomers is that music is what it's about. I think it's much easier to say that right off the bat, so people don't get the wrong idea. There's so much to learn, so it would be quite overwhelming to throw in the entire history of a 40 year old subculture at once - in addition to the history of the gothic, which spans what, 1000 years?

Goth is usually connected to gothic and spooky interests, like the gothic, all things halloween, fascination with death culture and so on - but that doesn't apply to all goths. We often do enjoy the gothic arts, but not everyone. And I don't think it's common for historians and such who specialize in the gothic are goths - not from what I've seen, at least!
Then we have the fashion; the easiest way to tell if someone is a goth. Or? While most goths express their taste in music through their looks, not everyone does. I for sure don't bother to do my make-up and hair most of the time, and I wear a uniform at work. And some people just don't feel the need.

I understand why all of this can be confusing! You see people on the internet say this and that, and you don't know who to listen to. Well; don't listen to anyone, you just do you! One thing is facts, but another thing is letting stuff on the internet dictate your life. I didn't even know about goth, I found it after the music, gothic literature, fashion and so on. I was really happy to find out that there were others like me out there. And if you find out that maybe you're not a goth after all, what does it matter? It's just a label. Everyone is different. And just because you can't claim a certain label for yourself doesn't mean that you can't be friends with goths.

So.. where does that leave us? Well, one thing I'd like to think is that goth is a culture - which includes fashion, lifestyle, literature, architecture and art as well as music. Not everyone agrees with this of course, and that's fine. But that still doesn't mean that gothic is the same as goth.
Gothic things don't make up the goth subculture, but it can be added to make up the goth / gothic culture, as many goths like both (I do, for example). So those things aren't goth in themselves, but they are somewhat related. Whereas goth music is goth music - that's what makes a goth a goth. A punk likes punk, a metalhead likes metal, and so on - goth is exactly the same. Everyone is different, but what people in a subculture have in common is the music - but often they have other similar interests too.

And to get more clarifications out of the way: No, you don't have to ONLY listen to goth music to be a goth. I am a metalhead as well, but I can also listen to Shania Twain. It doesn't matter. Everyone has outside interests - cause we're human. And no, you're not expected to know everything about goth, it's history and everything about every single band. Very few people do. You don't have to look goth to be goth either. What else is there... These are just things I don't even consider, cause it's so ridiculous. But sadly people actually believe these things. I've heard that it's because of elitists, but I've never seen this kind of behavior, online or in person. I've only heard people online talk about it, but it didn't happen to them. So I kind of feel that type of elitist is a myth. The word elitist is misused anyway, cause even I get called elitist, just for saying what goth is and isn't. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, and I certainly don't think I'm any better than anyone else for doing so. I just think it's important for the subculture not to be watered down, especially with all the misinformation out there today. Oh! One more clarification! All things goths like aren't goth. What I mean by that is that a lot of people call other interests they might have goth just because they're goths. Which is wrong to do. The donuts I made yesterday aren't goth because I made them - or metal for that matter, lol. If everything was goth, goth wouldn't be so special anymore. It's a specific thing, it has a definition. And it means a lot to a lot of us. We just want it to survive. I'm happy to help anyone who has any questions, cause why not? I love to share my interests with people who want to listen. I hope this has cleared things up! If anyone has any questions, just hit me up anywhere. Thanks for reading!

Further reading:
Barbaric Gothic by Aytakk
The Never-Ending Goth Debate - Gothic Charm School
Gothic - QI Series 7 Episode 13

Saturday, November 10, 2018

My First Norwegian Goth Night!

A couple of weeks back Simen came home from work and told me there was a goth night at the bar he works at. He was the bouncer that night, and suddenly heard Bela Lugosi's Dead. He talked to the DJs and ended up requesting lots of songs. I was pretty shocked! Goth isn't very big in Norway. There is one night in Oslo that happens a few times a year, and there was one event in Kristiansand this summer that I haven't heard more about. Bergen used to have at least one goth club, but it closed down while I was still a kid. So I messaged one of the DJs of the event and found out when the next one was, which was last night! It's a monthly event, and I hope it lasts so I have something to do LOL

My look for the evening, photos taken by Sandra. We hosted a little pre-party, since I had invited a bunch of friends to come with me and check this out. I just got ready at my living room table while we talked, haha. Didn't wanna miss the fun by being stuck in the bathroom! Emma took this lovely photo of me when I had just started getting ready:

Shortly before 23 we left to go to Café Opera, which is where the event was. We sat upstairs until the music started about half an hour later. We came down to this:
Lovely DJs Frida and Amanda - I believe they're danish. They were super sweet and happy that I brought friends. Of course, I'm excited for this and want to support it!

We sat down for about half an hour or so before we started dancing. I don't know if it's a norwegian unwritten rule or anything, but I feel like it isn't okay to dance before midnight, hahaha. But right around midnight a good danceable song came on! It might have been She Past Away, I don't remember. I was really happy with the music, they mostly played post-punk and goth rock, and lots of danceable tracks. I think I barely sat down after getting up to dance - I was pretty tired in the end!

Kendra showed up towards the end! Time just flew by, and I didn't even check my phone, I had so much fun. That's why none of the photos in this post were taken by me, so thanks friends, for giving me photos to use on here! We danced on until me and Simen had to take the last bus home. It was a super successful night, I even got drunk! In contrast to last weekend when I had like 8 rum and cokes and didn't feel anything. But I might have had more liquor than that last night, not sure. I slowed down when we got to Café Opera, but it didn't really hit me until we got home, haha. I was too busy dancing and having fun to notice! Looking forward to next time, one of the DJs told me the next one is december 14. If someone reading this is in Bergen then, like Café Opera's facebook page and look out for the event (it should be out around a week before). I really want this night to keep going, that would make me super happy! It's so boring being a goth in Norway. Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, November 7, 2018

Crossdressing as Aurelio Voltaire & other Oslo shenanigans

Heyhey! Wanted to share what I did this weekend with you guys. My friend Marthe had a halloween party, so I flew over to finally meet her for the first time! Her house was already full of people from different countries when I arrived, which was really cool! One of them was a piercer, so as Marthe captioned this photo on Instagram: Some people have Tupperware parties, and some have piercing parties!
Got a second ring in my right lobe.
Sunday I got my left eyebrow pierced.
I'll probably post good photos of them later!

Found myself at the toy store!

Then it was time to get ready for the party.
A friend gave me a binder, and it worked wonders!

Everyone getting ready

And here is my costume!
I think it went really well!

I've never drawn on a beard (or chesthair) before xD

And Captain Morgan to boot!

A wild demon Marthe!

She's wearing tall shoes, I'm not THAT small LOL

Those two were fighting all night LOL

Marthe has chickens, so I got myself a parrot!

So that was a little recap of my weekend! Mostly wanted to show you my epic costume.
I absolutely loved it, what do you think?
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